The Year That Went By…

As I sit by the Ocean, watching the waves touch the shore, waiting for the sun to set, unconsciously I start reflecting on the year that just passed by. The first image that comes to my mind is Ishaan (my son) first steps and my parent’s happiness in seeing him walk.

The year 2012 did teach me a lot, especially to enjoy the highs and fight the lows. The year was indeed memorable and I am sure, I will never seize to forget this year. The year started with a customary New Year party that finished at the wee hours of the morning, while our son was fast asleep. Since he had just learnt to turn, the occasional check on him and a prolonged moment of wondering ‘how can we love someone so much?’ and while we did so, we had so many thought that passed through our minds. As the clock struck 12 and the year 2012 started, me and my husband decided to go together to check on our son. While doing so, the very look at my husband, whose smile and a prolonged unwavering gaze at Ishaan spoke a million words. The next day when I asked him about it, he simple shrugged and said “I just love him too much”. Watching my in-laws play with Ishaan and relish every minute spent with him, made me realize that happiness can be extracted from small things in life. No amount of expensive gifts can be ever compared to the fulfillment you get when you see your child smile at you and the unconditional love you receive from him.

My husband asked me today, so what were your high and lows of 2012 and surprisingly, I could only think of highs and lows associated with Ishaan. I felt elated when Ishaan said his first word, his first turn, his first step, his time with his grandparents, his first day at school, his laughter on seeing children around, his million dollar smile when he sees us from a distance and the list went on… What astonishes me is the fact that, not at one point did I repent that personally I hadn’t achieved anything this year. I think my greatest achievement was to hear Ishaan say his first words, his first step to many more, to have been able to be the first one to feed him his first meal and all meals. I thank god today for allowing me to cherish the moments, which are irreplaceable. And I would also thank the almighty for giving my parents the opportunity of spending time with their grandson. The pleasure they took in being a part of his growing process, the contentment they experienced when Ishaan did different things and the joy they got when he use to look at them and smile, makes this year the memorable year.

The lows were hard hitting too, the kind that you will never ever forget. The worst of all was when Ishaan fell ill. Malaria was spreading and had caught Ishaan too. The seriousness of the situation was not felt, until he woke up from his sleep, tried to walk and gave a shiver. I still remember going to his pediatrician and seeing his fever touch 104 degrees. What came next was a nightmare that will never be forgotten. Holding him down for his injection, while he cried his lungs out, is something that I had never dreamt of doing. I think, this is the only low that qualifies to be the lowest point of this year. No other situation, however bad it was, can be compared to this one.

In all, as we all say, every passing minute teaches you something and yes, I have learnt a lot this year. The unconditional love from my husband, which could be felt every time he rushes back home, so that I could go to the gym, The unreserved love from my child’s every time he looked at me, the never ending from my parent, when they force me to eat more and the wholehearted concern from my in-laws, who never failed to make their daughter – in – laws feel like their own daughters.

I feel blessed to have all of you in my life! The sun has finally set, marking the end of the day of 2012 and tomorrow will be a beginning of yet another year with lots of pleasurable moments with my loved ones.

The Love within all of us

Love has no definition. Even if it did, the definition varies, depending on each person’s perception. To me Love is beyond articulation. It is more in action than in words… but many would think otherwise and I do respect their way of loving.  

We all have loved and the same has been different for various people in your life. Your love for your parents, love for your friends and loving that one person with whom you would and will (optimistically speaking) spend your life with. But what we generally forget is that we do unconsciously fall in love with some people we meet in life. But this love doesn’t necessarily have to be the love that we all think Love is. It’s the respect that sheds love in it and to me, Senegal has taught me that.

Living in Senegal has taught me a lot. Hailing from a country, known for its diversification in culture that amalgamates and makes us Indians, has also rendered me with ways to look at things around me. Being an Indian, you would involuntarily demarcate southerners from northerners , as you would with east from the west. Each coming from different parts of India are looked at upon with a preconceived notion. A popular example is the way with which a North Indian looks at a South Indian, he would surely think “ahh, he/she would be intelligent, either an Engineer or Doctor”. This could be seen in a good way or to those who feel threatened by the other cultures intelligence or so called perceived intelligence, would try and demean them by quoting some intelligent (that is what they wish to believe) talks like “Madrasis always have curd rice. You black people know nothing but work” and many more. What they forget is that the same people, who take the sadistic pleasure in passing such derogatory remark, relish and lip smackingly eat the other dishes like Dosas and Idlis, which are from south India. To them all Southerners are Madrasis. This is most of Northern India’s way of describing South Indians. In the same manner, people who come from the East are all from Kolkata. I fail to understand, when each one of us are taught Geography in our Schooling days, were all these people daydreaming about food? These are the same people who could rattle out the names of the smallest village abroad and would love to go settle there.

The reason I quoted the above is not to express my frustration but to clearly differentiate the attitude difference between those from a very developed country to those from a under developed country. This is just not restricted to Indian but to many other people from different nations. 

I clearly remember, when I had told people that I would be going to live in Senegal, the first thing they said was…”what would you do in a country full of Blacks”. I had retaliated saying, “the same as what I do in a country, where I deal with illiterate people and morons”. 

Senegal has been the most wonderful experience for me. I am almost completing three years here, which have passed effortlessly and fast. This country has taught me friendliness and respect for each one of the people here. Like India which was colonized by Britishers, Senegal was colonized by French. But unlike many Indian, Senegalese people are not bitter and demeaning towards others.  

‘Teranga’, as Senegal is believed to be, means Welcome. And I reckon that it is indeed very welcoming. It is not the country that matters but it’s the people living in the country that makes the country so welcoming. As you walk down any street here, you would be greeted warmly by people who don’t even know you. Here it isn’t necessary for people to know you, to be said good morning to. Each and everyone’s conversation starts with a greeting and confirming if your family is good. It is imperative for you to greet the person before asking them anything. This is applicable to even the shopkeepers, where you would buy your daily provision. What amazes me is when you do greet them, you are automatically bestowed with so much calmness and friendliness that the remaining conversation with them seems like you have known them for years together.

Many might say that this country has nothing but sand… but I would contradict it with saying, this country has everything that other developed country doesn’t have. This country has people who make you feel at home. This country makes you feel as if you belong here, this country teaches you how every person, irrelevant of their social stature, love and respect one another. This country makes you feel safe to walk down the road even at the wee hours of the morning and not feel scared. This country teaches you to love people from different culture and countries.

We Indians have an uncanny habit of admiring and loving everything that’s White… ooh they love white skin… But what I refuse to understand is, when you are from a country that has all the different skin tones, how can you be so biased at looking at things?

Senegal has taught me another definition of love. Love to respect and the world will respect you back with ample of love in it.